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Category Archives: Complaint Free for 30 Days Challenge

Day 6 of the “30 Days of Loving Yourself Project”

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(photo source)

Day 6: Make a list of ten things you’re grateful for and display it where you’ll see it often.

The Blurb: Gratitude is one of the easiest- and unfortunately most overlooked- ways to improve  your quality of life. It’s quick, doesn’t cost any money or even much time. It’s the simple act of acknowledging the little things that become big things because you focus on them. This is a truth my grandpa taught me- “what you focus on expands.” Our brains are wired to adapt to reoccurring situations and so it’s easy to overlook things we should be thankful for on a daily basis. There’s nothing like having something taken away to make you grateful for it.

Suggestions: This is one of the easiest days to accomplish. Just grab a piece of paper and jot down 10 things you are thankful for and put it somewhere you’ll see it until the day before Valentines day, when we finish up this project. They can be big or small. In college I kept a “thankful journal.” At the end of each night I would just write a few sentences of one or two things that happened that day. I can’t even tell you how much this simple and quick daily act helped to improve my attitude about everything in my life. I started noticing things during the day that I could put in my journal at night, which me realize just how good I had it.

Keeping it Real:

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Here’s my list of 10 things I’m thankful for today:

1) My family. I am blessed beyond measure. I have an amazing hubby, awesome daughters and the cutest little boy around.

2) My amazingly supportive friends. I am lucky to have many close friends. I am also a part of a GNO group with amazing women who inspire me and keep me laughing all the time.

3) The ability to share my writing with others. I’m currently working on getting one book published while I finish a second one (details on my website). I love blogging once a week and sharing occasional writing excepts –  here’s one of my favorites.

4) Laughter. I think laughing  is the only way to make it through life’s journey. I LOVE to be around people who make me laugh. Every now and then I just need a doubled over-tears streaming-cant catch your breath-kind of laugh. One of my favorite things about my hubby is that he is constantly making me laugh. I love that guy.

5) The little things- Hugs. Stolen moments. A good workout. Cooking.  My phone. Hats. Sunshine. Outings. Memories. Late nights and early mornings with my baby. Smoothies. Audiobooks. Texts. Cold sheets and warm blankets. Funky socks. Iced chai. Mopped floors. Freshly done hair. Shoes. Painted nails. Extras. Sleep. People that motivate. Anything outdoors. Jogging strollers. Kisses from my baby. Hints that spring could come. Holidays. Snuggling with my sleepy baby. Pictures.

6) Books- I love reading. In fact, I read 50 books last year and was changed in so many ways.

7) Flexible schedule. I’m thankful that I’m able to work from home and be around my kiddos.

8) Goals. I’m proud of the things I’ve accomplished and excited for all the things yet to come.

9) Music. I’m a huge fan of almost any kind of music. I think it speaks to you in a way that nothing else can. It can motivate you, soothe you when you need a break or get you pumped when you need some adrenaline. I have music playing almost all the time. Seriously, I feel like my life has a soundtrack.

10) This year. I have a lot of awesome things planned to accomplish this year. I’m am thankful for all the people in my life that have helped me get to where I am, and excited to keep stepping it up.

Photo of the Day:

photo 2It’s been so much fun creating this project. If you want to join in, here’s the “30 Days of Loving Yourself Project” breakdown.

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See ya tomorrow!

Brooke

What you focus on…. My start of the 30 Day Complaint Free Challenge

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Alright!  I am officially Complaint Free for 30 Days! I just received my book and bracelet in the mail. This is on my Bucket List and I’m really excited to start!!  I wrote a little bit about what I’m doing here.

“If you don’t like something, change it.  If you can’t change it, change your attitude.  Don’t complain.” – Maya Angelou

There are all sorts of scientific facts to substantiate the idea that your thoughts contain a huge amount of power. When I was growing up, we used to live on the east coast, away from all of our extended family. About once a year or so, my grandparents would come out to visit us. I’m the oldest grandchild (and the favorite…. my blog, my rules), no but seriously, I’m my grandpa’s favorite.  Anyway, each time he came, we would have a little “chat,” where he would give me something to work on until the next time I saw him. I’m not sure why, but I always took these talks very seriously and was really interested in what he had to say. Maybe because he was so honest with me, and would call me out. The topics of conversation ranged from “you possess a power of persuasion that you need to stop using on your parents” (wait, did he just say I’m manipulative?) to dating advice (which he was surprisingly astute on) to this little gem:

“Whatever you focus on, EXPANDS.  So choose wisely.” -(the amazing) Joseph Bishop 

These words became a mantra I’ve followed throughout my life.  Basically, my grandpa came up with “The Secret” before it was a thing. :) He’s completely right. Thoughts are very powerful, and you need to be vigilant when choosing what you spend your time thinking about. If you keep thinking about how much you dislike something, whether it be a situation, a job, a significant other, those thoughts eventually turn into a negative feelings that can drown your happiness. Once you decide you hate your job/school/situation etc, it’s all you can think about, and then even when good things are happening, you are quick to dismiss them because your focus has shifted. If you only look at all the things your significant other does that drive you crazy, it won’t be long before those thoughts will take over. And you will be miserable. Whatever you focus on expands.

If you aren’t happy about a something, look for ways to change it, just like Maya Angelou said. Focus on what YOU can to do improve it. Sometimes, just realigning your focus can clear things up. Other times, you will have to be creative on how you can keep positive in the midst of imperfect situations.

One thing that has helped me in the past, is keeping a little thankful journal. I used to do this back in college. I had a notebook by the side of my bed, and each night I would write a few one liners of things I appreciated about the day.  They were simple things, but it trained me to focus on the positive, instead of negative. I found my attitude about life in general was significantly improved just by this one little act.

Sometimes you’ve got to look for the silver lining to find the good.  (On an only partially relevant note, if you haven’t seen “Silver Linings Playbook” you must finish reading this post, and then without delay, find the nearest computer/tv/viewing device and watch. It’s fantastic!)

So, in an effort to take my grandpa’s advice, as of today, I am Complaint Free for 30 days! Focusing on positive things! I’m wearing the bracelet as a visual reminder. Any of you can hold me accountable- if you hear me complain, I’m back to Day ONE. I’m excited to read the book and learn more about it. If you want to do it with me, you can order your own and read more about it here.

While we are talking about me wearing this bracelet, can I just mention that I have the smallest wrists ever?? (Notice that this is NOT a complaint.  It is a statement of fact.)

Look how far up my arm this bracelet goes (most others do the same thing, though)…

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Awesome! Ok, I’m excited! I hope you all have an amazing Memorial Day Weekend, and that you get to relax and do something outside! Summer is almost here! See ya Tuesday!

Brooke

 

 

 

Unsolicited Advice for the Future Generation

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This commercial cracks me up!  Especially with all the Social Media out there, it’s a pretty accurate portrayal of  how the younger generation view things.  What ever happened to going outside?  Or having conversations with people… face to face?  An alarming amount of communication is hidden behind texting, and while I’m all for efficiency, I feel like the next generation is growing up MISSING some of what makes life great!

In the spirit of passing along wisdom to the next generation, I’d like to offer some unsolicited advice to our young up-and-comers.  So, let’s have a conversation, and try to keep the eye rolling to a minimum…

Here are some things I’ve picked up along the way, that I wish I’d known when I was younger.

  • Don’t worry about what others think.  Be yourself in all of your original glory- that’s what draws people in.  Life it too short to spend it dwelling on negativity from others.  Be yourself, own it, and let everything else roll off your back.  You don’t have any room in your life for people that drain you.  If they aren’t giving enough back… let them go.
  • Go Outside– I promise it will heal your soul.  Take a walk, ride a bike, go up in the mountains, squish your toes in the sand at the beach, or just have a picnic at a park.  Get out in nature.  Breathe in the air and allow your problems to slip away.  Things that seem insurmountable will resolve themselves in your subconscious, or at least they won’t seem as insurmountable.
  • Don’t be afraid to be on your own.  As much fun as it is to be around friends and family all the time, its equally important to learn to be comfortable in your own space.  YOU create your own happiness, so get comfy with your bad self!
  • Don’t eat crap.  Be conscious of what you put into your body.  Pound the water, grab those fruits and veggies.  Cut out the sugar and processed foods.  Watch your portions.  Don’t eat late at night.  But know that as long as you are doing these things most of the time, it’s totally ok to indulge now and then.  Moderation is key.
  • End the day by thinking of something that you’re thankful for, then either write it down or tell someone about it.  You’ll be surprised how this one little act will change your attitude about your entire life.  I’m going to take the 30 Day Complaint Free Challenge, which should be much easier if I am focusing on what I’m thankful for instead of what’s bugging me.
  • Look people in the eye when you’re talking.  This seems to be a dying art as texting, emailing and facebooking don’t generate any kind of confidence in this area.  Try it- you will be amazed how captivating you will become.
  • Be honest.  Don’t lie, don’t talk about other’s behind their backs, don’t be catty.  The art of being a lady/gentleman will go a long way towards making and keeping friends.
  • If you make a mistake, fess up to it.  You will have a much better shot at patching things up, and you will keep respect that will otherwise be lost.  Most importantly on this one- say your sorry, and I mean actually say those words, “I’m sorry.”  You’ll be amazed at how it works.
  • Try new things and keep your options open.  Make a Bucket List and stretch yourself!  Having large and small goals along the way is what makes life great.  Taste that calamari, try out for the team, take the LSAT, do the study abroad, learn the language, pull an all-nighter, take that interview.  You are meant to be great- make it happen.
  • Figure out what you love and then DONT LET GO.  Make your work you passion.  Work harder than everyone else around you and cling to what you love.  Don’t listen to anyone that ever says you can’t do it.  Prove them wrong.
  • Look your best.  You will feel more confident if you just take a few minutes to present your best self.  For the ladies: Put on a little mascara, invest in a bra that fits, put on ear rings when you pull your hair up, wear clothes that flatter your figure, paint your toes.  Own a black dress- you can vamp it up or make it casual, it works in almost every scenario.  For the men: Be well groomed-shave that hair at the back of your neck, wear clothes that are tailored to your body type.  Have at least one pair of decent shoes, own a nice suit, but never underestimate the power of a guy in good jeans and a t-shirt.  Wear cologne, but not too much.  Smile.  A little class never hurt anyone.
  • Listen.  I mean really listen when someone is talking.  Take a genuine interest in people and what they’re going through.  You can learn enough to avoid some serious mistakes if you just open your ears.
  • Be good to your family.  Spend time with them and make them important in your life.  Forgive and mend relationships- as long as they are not unhealthy.  Ask your grandparents and parents questions before its too late.  Show up for events that are important to other family members.  Say I love you, and say it often.
  • Be active.  You only get one body- make it a healthy one.  Change up your workout routine so you don’t get bored. There’s lots of ways to get a workout in that doesn’t involve a gym membership.  Get friends involved.  You’re a lot more likely to succeed if you do it with someone.
  • Create traditions.  Involve those you love and find reasons to celebrate.  Celebrate holidays and make your own.  Have a reason to celebrate every month.  Do Taco Tuesdays, go to the lakehouse every summer, stay in your pajamas all day, meet up for happy hour, vacation to a new place the same week every year, take a road trip.  Always have something to look forward to!
  • Give back.  Nothing will pull you out of depression faster than doing something for someone else.  It doesn’t have to be a big thing, but to someone else, it can mean the world.
  • Don’t judge.  I promise, promise, promise you don’t know everything that person is going through, or has been through, or how hard they are fighting just to be who they are.  A little tip- there will be a point in your life when you hope with everything in you, that others will extend you the same courtesy.
  • Do something nice unexpectedly.  Bring flowers.  Surprise someone.  Send chocolate.  Write a love letter.  Bring coffee.  Send a text.  Clean a room.  Give a massage.  Leave a message.  Give a hug.  Bring dinner.  Spend time.
Well there you have it… little life-lesson gems from a seasoned veteran (haha) who hopes some of it will ring true.  I think life can be stripped down to the moments we spend with family and friends or in the pursuit of a passion.  All the rest is just filler.
What you would add- what little gems of advice do you have for the future generation?  What’s on your Bucket List? I’d love to hear from you!
Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Complaint Free for 30 Days Challenge

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(Picture Source)

I’ve been reading Between Shades of Gray, which is NOT the same as 50 Shades of Grey, lest there be any confusion.   I will be moderating “Between Shades of Gray” at the fabulous Delicious Reads book club in June.  This book is the story of a small family who are taken as prisoners under Stalin’s rule in the early 40’s and forced to endure the cruelest of conditions.  It’s a fabulous and tragic read so far, and I won’t give away more of the plot here.

Anyway, the story has got me thinking about the power of positivity in the face of adversity.  There are thousands of stories showcasing what the human mind is capable of, especially when the odds are stacked against someone.  During tough times, it seems like people either crumble, or they rise to the challenge and become stronger.  In life or death situations, someone’s outlook on life and maintaining a positive attitude can have a direct bearing on their survival.  I love learning about how people handle tough situations.  Especially as a mother, I’m extra sensitive to people who put on a brave face for their children, teaching them to be strong and capable.

Thankfully, I’m not facing any major life dilemmas, but I’ve been thinking about how I would handle things if I were.  One of the items on my Bucket List  is to become Complaint Free for 30 days.  The idea is to “leave the toxic communication of complaining behind and experience an internal shift toward being more positive, hopeful and optimistic.”  So you wear this bracelet on your wrist to help you remember during the day to only voice positive things and see how it affects your life.  They say it takes 21 days to form a habit, so by the 30th day, hopefully it will stick, and you will be better for it.  So, I’ve ordered my bracelet, and will begin as soon as I get it.  (Yes, I KNOW I do not need a bracelet to do this… but it’s much more fun this way, so just go with it, ok?)

Want to do it with me?  You can order your own bracelet here.  I’m interested to see how many times a day I will have to change my way of thinking.  They say that on average people complain 15-30 times in a day.  I wonder how many times I do it?  Maybe I will tweet every complaint I was going to say out loud.  Kidding!

Has anyone else done this?  At this posting there are 10,121 812 other bracelets out there…  So I’ll let you know when I’m going to start!  Hope you all have a great weekend!  See ya Tuesday!

Brooke

 

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